1. Gender and Sexuality 101

Sex and Gender

Yes, there is a difference. Sex is basically the polarity of anatomy, that is, whether you have traditionally female anatomy (e.g. vagina) or male anatomy (e.g. penis). Most people think that there are just two sexes: male and female. However, such is not the case. People who are intersexed (born possessing some combination of both male and female anatomy) or transsexual (see below) constitute sexes which are neither exactly male nor exactly female.

On the other hand, gender is basically the polarity of appearance and behaviour, and is exhibited by countless signals, from articles of clothing to cosmetics, hairstyles, conversational styles, body language and much more. As with "sex", gender is not a simple case of "either/or." Though our culture tends to group characteristics into "masculine" and "feminine," there is some crossover between the two categories. Examples of this are men with long hair and women with close-cropped hair, or soft-spoken, nurturing men and aggressive, competitive women. Ultimately, gender is a "mix and match" mode of self-expression.

Sexual Orientation vs. Gender Identity vs. Sexual Identity

Sexual Orientation refers to which sex you find romantically/erotically attractive. This is generally categorised into 3 types: hetero (opposite), homo (same), or bi (both).

Gender Identity refers to how you see yourself socially. This is also generally categorised into 3 types: man (one may have a vagina but prefer to relate socially as a man), woman (one may have a vagina but prefer to relate as a man), or some combination of both. In this last category, one may prefer to be fluid (relating sometimes as a man and sometimes as a woman), or androgynous (not identify as either male or female).

Sexual Identity is how you see yourself physically: male, female, or in between. If someone is born female, but wishes to see their body as male in all respects, their sexual identity is male. It is generally rude to speak of such a person as female, since it denies their right to inhabit the social and physical role of their choosing.

Now that we understand the difference between the 5 characteristics, we should acknowledge 2 important facts that run across the board:

1. All these characteristics are not experienced or exhibited in one of a set number of ways. That is, they vary along a continuous spectrum of self-expression.



2. All of these characteristics are mutually exclusive of each other and may exist in any combination in an individual. For example, a person could be born anatomically female but with male gender and sexual identities. However, this person could also have a sexual preference towards men.

Transgendered, Transsexual, Transvestite. What's the difference?

Transgender: An umbrella term used to describe anyone whose gender identity or expression situates them differently than the traditional gender role they were assigned at birth. This term would be applicable to all of the terms listed below.

Transsexual: Someone who has or wishes to take all the steps necessary to be accepted as completely as possible in their chosen gender. This may not necessarily entail all hormone therapy, top and bottom surgery.

Transvestite: Someone who on occasion wears what is currently considered the clothes of the other sex to relieve gender discomfort. Cross-dressers want to appear as "convincing as possible as their other selves," and this can be done for both sexual and non-sexual reasons. Another term used is cross-dresser.

Androgyne: Person appearing and identifying as neither man nor woman, presenting a gender either mixed or neutral.

Gender Bender: Anyone crossing the gender line who does not care about appearing "convincing". An example is a man wearing a dress, who looks like a man wearing a dress, and doesn't care if he does look like a man wearing a dress.